The Alibis

MOGASM Diary – Final Entries

Sunday 20th Movember

It’s the week of MOGASM, and, as is customary following an all-night Championship Manager 97/98 session at Shed’s, I am up at the crack of noon. Having inspired Darlington to relegation from the Premier League, I now need to inspire myself to get home, changed, washed and ready for rehearsals at 6pm.

I’m off to a great start when the train I am due to get is cancelled. This leaves me stuck at Livi North for half an hour extra, which is spent turning my nose up at the (pitiful) sandwich selection in Morrison’s. I settle on a chocolate brownie., which is consumed with great haste in the passenger seat of Shed’’ car.

Upon finally returning to my residence in Edinburgh, I set about preparing all my guitar gear (the actual guitar is at Rob’s) and am just out the shower (calm down, ladies!) when a text from Janahan informs me that tonight’s practice is cancelled on account of an unwell drummer. We will now practice on Wednesday and Thursday night.

I react to this by firing up the Xbox and playing Arkham City until my eyes bleed. Thankfully Janahan pops over around 10pm to drop off my batch of MOGASM tickets. We have a cup of tea and discuss plans for Friday. Then it should be time for bed, but I manage to squeeze a few more pummellings for the thugs of Gotham City.

Monday 21st Movember

Ah, the joy of getting up for work, having spent the weekend thoroughly wrecking one’s sleep pattern. Work is pleasant enough, although a tad busier than I would have liked, and my esteemed colleagues are all in good form. I start to mercilessly flog MOGASM tickets, and hope that my sales pitch of promising the sun, moon and stars on a stick will not be back to haunt me at some future occasion.

With work duly dispensed with (haha!) I go to get my hair highlighted (so vain) and then it’s off to Loanhead to see the missus, who is in good form. Sadly, my lack of sleep catches up with me, and I’m curled up before midnight. Rock’n’Roll!!!

Tuesday 22nd Movember

An early rise and bus into town. Bad. Coffee from the Zulu Lounge. Good. Busy day at work. Bad. Compliments on hair. Good. E-mails sent to Rob winding him up about the set-list. Very Good. Manchester City lose. Good. United only draw. Bad. Practice ‘Reflection’ on guitar a few times. Like riding a bike, as they say. Finish the evening with shameless plugging on facebook, followed by graphic novel – Batman: Dark Victory. Highlight of day.

Wednesday 23rd Movember

Woke up, got outta bed, dragged a comb across my head. Looking up, I realised I was knackered so made coffee so strong it’d melt your face. Proceeded to work sporting latest in melted-face caffeine fuelled twitches. Got annoyed with ward. Swore to myself, felt better.

After work it was all hands to the pump as I made my way to the Wee Red Bar, in order to hand in our deposit and a poster to Colvin, the manager of the afore-mentioned establishment. After that it was time for the first rehearsals of the week.

Things got off to a great start when Rob’s amplifier wouldn’t work, but after that we made our way, relatively-trouble free through two alternative set-lists. Clearly the one I was championing sounded better, but no decision would be made until after Thursday’s practice.

Most songs were played well, barring a slight problem pace-wise with a new intro to Perfect Victim, and a ropey first rendition of Blue Eyes and Gunfire. Nevertheless, I was in fairly good spirits as I made my way home to collapse into bed…

Thursday 24th Movember

Had a dreadful night of no sleep so approach work with all the enthusiasm of a week-old sloth with a headache. The day drags and drags and drags and drags. Once the slowest day in the history of the world is over I head home and manage 40 minutes blissful shut-eye before getting up, showering, having a piece of toast and hopping once again on the bus to Junction Street. Rob informs me that he is having dinner with an actual woman, rendering me momentarily speechless. He returns to his abode and we start lugging guitars over to rehearsal. I love my Gretsch, but it’s possibly the largest most unwieldy thing since the contents of Linford Christie’s briefs. Rob caves in over set-list choices and celebrate my first ever victory in the band. It’s short-lived as I realise I have forgotten to turn the volume up on my guitar during an otherwise good versions of ‘Blue eyes and Gunfire’. Scarily, it sounds better without my guitar!
The other songs pass quite well, despite a couple of problems requiring sorted with “Somebody Somewhere” and Jan and Amy deciding to slightly modify the start to ‘Cut Free’.
With all those minor knick-knacks out of the way, it’s a bus journey home, and then bed. Mogasm is approaching…..

Friday 25th Movember

It’s the dawning of the big day, and the snooze button is receiving a hell of a pummelling. I finally drag myself out of bed and marvel at the volume of my bed-hair. The shower and liberal application of 400lbs of ghee help to tame this unruly mop, and it’s off to work.
I have to confess that I am easily the most nervous of The Alibis. Rob gets the occasional nervous moment (he cannot sit still) but Team Rhythm appears to have ice flowing through their too-cool-for-school veins. As the clock moves slowly at work, I’m envisaging all the worst-case scenarios. What if no-one turns up? What if we’re rubbish? What if I accidentally electrocute myself and innocent spectators?
I’m only in for a half day, so mercifully, I am released from work and head home. I grab a quick sandwich (tuna for preference, in these uncertain times) and a coffee (which apparently is bad for the vocal chords) and consume them with undue haste.
Once home I check and re-check the equipment I have approximately seventeen times. A couple of last minute plugs on facebook, and it’s time to dress like a star/hobo (delete as applicable). Brown cowboy boots. Red jeans. Silver belt. Chain. Joker T-shirt. Jacket. Elvis shades. Red streak in hair. Sorted.
Make cautious way to gig, avoiding fashion police as I do so. For once, the others are all there before me (thank you Lothian Buses) and setting up is underway. I assist Jan in plastering the entire venue in posters, before an impromptu soundcheck, hampered by the fact we have no bass drum. This will be rectified when the support band show up, but until then Amy has to make do with striking Rob’s taut left buttock to achieve that deep booming sound.
Soundcheck over, it’s time for a couple of mercy dashes to Starbucks (the first for coffee, the second for lots of change) and then various bits and bobs start to arrive, including soup, cake, support bands, and crucially, guests!! Yes, the place is filling up, and this allays my fears of playing to a disinterested half-empty room, although it gives rise to fears of playing to a disinterested full room…
Thankfully the Remnant Kings start things off with a bang, and the night is soon in full flow to a great atmosphere. Mentalist Colin McLeod blows a few minds and displays his bottom, and then we play a good tight set, which is well-received by our audience. Highlights for me included Cut Free, my solo reflection, and our closer, Kojak. Basking in the euphoria of a job well done, I thank many people for coming, and set to work showing off some dance moves which frankly should have been outlawed years ago.
The drink flows and the chat is good. My good lady (to shouts of ‘fix’) has won Miss Movember, so is also in good spirits, and one late-night pizza later, we are in a taxi heading off to Loanhead….job’s a good ‘un.

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  1. Rob says:

    My taut left buttock is the kick drum of choice for the discerning percussionist

  2. […] Click on Ron to get the story of a Mogasmic week from our front man’s perspective on our Blog. […]

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